You know those to-do lists of yours – the ones that you can never get done?
Well, today we’re going to dig into the brain science behind those not-crossed-off tasks and figure out what’s causing the problem, what you can do about it, and how to keep that from ever happening again in your planning life.
Sound good? Let’s get started.
Energy cycles & your brain
First off, let’s talk about energy cycles. Did you know that your brain is naturally “on” for roughly ninety minutes at a time?
You are here: Your to-do list is stretching a mile long. There are at least a dozen top priority things on today. And that’s not even getting into next week’s list, which is looming in your brain….
What if I told you that you only had time – real, productive, brain-on time – for 3 main things each day? Once you’ve gotten the kids ready, had breakfast, done a little housework, gotten a load of laundry in, thawed the meat for supper/prepped the Instapot…
You’re still working on that 90-minute clock, remember? It’s already time for a break. You still have another couple 90-minute cycles that day.
But you can’t redecorate the house, hunt down the missing dr.’s info + set up a new appointment, and research paint colors – all in one day. (With food to prep, a load of laundry to fold, and the kids to pick up from school/debrief from online learning.)
It’s just not realistic.
How to sync to-dos with energy cycles
Let’s go back to those 90-minute cycles + 3 tasks for the day.
- What is achievable: find the missing dr.’s office paperwork. That’s 1 thing.
- Call and set up a new appointment. That’s a 2nd thing.
- And then browse paint scheme inspiration (not the whole project – just one action!) – that’s your 3rd thing.
See how much more realistic that is? How much more likely to get that done?
Sure, you’d like to see the paint colors chosen and the rest of the house redecorated. It’s been on your list for months (or years!).
But you can’t actually get it done in a day – not unless the kids are off at grandma’s and you have a clean slate! So take a load off, and cut down your task list to something manageable.
You’ll be able to check off everything you put on your list, every day – and that’s a nice accomplishment.
If you cut down your (unrealistic) expectations, you’ll find that everything fits.
We’ve got to stop expecting ourselves to play Superwomen, okay? We just can’t do everything we think we can/should/need to.
So get real, right-size your to-do list, and everything will fit in your day just fine.
If you cut down your to-do list expectations, you’ll find that everything fits.
Why you MUST check out for a while
What you’re thinking: I’m too busy to take time for myself.
You’ve already checked the to-do list – you miiiight squeeze in 8 out of 10 things that really need to happen today – if you’re really on the ball and nothing goes wrong.
Might.
But realistically, you’ll run out of steam by item 6 (and if things go haywire, item 4!).
So there’s no way, no way at all, you can afford to take an hour out for yourself. Or so you say.
Truth: Guess what – after a few of those 90-minute work cycles, you need a longer break. Your body and brain just naturally say they’re tired (you’ve run out of decision-making juice), and that’s when you need a restart.
Which, by the way, doesn’t happen in 20 minutes on your phone! No, that takes a good hour (maybe more!) by yourself, doing something that’s fun for you, that lights you up.
That’s what it takes.
So no, you’re not needy. You’re honoring your body, giving your brain a break by doing something completely different, and coming back with your energy buckets completely refilled, ready to tackle the 2nd shift.
Okay? You need that refill when you’re “on duty” till 8pm at night – you can’t “work” all day from 7am!
It’s a scientific fact – working overtime leads to poorer work quality, fewer results, and more mistakes made. We’re just not built to function at our best after more than an 8-hour shift.
And how many hours are you pulling? Truly? From sun up to sundown (and past!)?
What you’re thinking: I’m too needy. I shouldn’t need this much time to recharge.
Truth: Maybe someone told you that they didn’t need this much time. Or your husband criticized your request for a couple hours off on the weekend. (And how much time does he spend decompressing after work each day?)
Look – you didn’t pick your personality. God wired that into you. So you’re not choosing to be a high maintenance mom, or pretending to be someone you’re not to get more perks.
This is you; this is your reality.
You’re introverted, you have kids, and you need those brain breaks to spool down + back up to peak functioning.
So what do you say – is your to-do list looking a little more manageable now?
Have you promised to only add three items to your task list, and give yourself a break every ninety minutes?
If so, your days are about to get a whole lot better. And you’ll look at an everything-crossed-off to-do list each night when you go to bed.
(Which is an awesome, pat-yourself-on-the-back feeling, as all of us list makers know!)
How are brain energy cycles going to change your #momlife today?
